I Love You and You Love Me Back?

During our time on this Earth we all experience love and in turn we experience loss. When I  think of my life I can think back to being a teenager and being in what I thought was love and when that ended I was crushed and thought to myself I will never love again... Unitl ... I did... it makes me wonder today is that the plan anyway??? Are we supposed to fall in love and then lose that love only to realize that our greatest love has not come yet? Or maybe it came and we let it pass by.

Recently I was asking myself some hard questions and I thought of someone that loved me very much and at the time I was in a situation that did not allow me to return that love....no let me correct myself I was in a place where I was worried about what everyone would say if they found out that I loved that person and wanted to be with them. In not confessing my love, I hurt that person and I truly think of who they are today and can not help but think that it is partly my fault that they are so guarded and unwilling to share their heart. In the mean time I have found love again, but often think of this person. So I reached out to them only to be greeted with a cold reception. I did not let that deter me from expressing my feelings to this person, telling them at the time I was not strong enough to deal with what would hve come from expressing my love to them at the time. I was called a coward, (head low) and it hurt, they told me how we could hve faced the world together and the nay sayers would see that love could overcome anything. I felt so ashamed, they still held the same hurt in their heart. I think the part that got me most was when I said I still love you and will always care for you..and they responded I never stopped loving you....and I forgive you....That forgiveness was something that I wanted to hear for years. I found myself thinking could I be with this person today the person  that Iam now...and I realized that I could not.. I do not think that I would ever truly believe that I was forgiven and that they would ever really love me like they did...So what is one to do... I stay on my side of the world and they stay on theirs...when we do see each other we barely have eye contact and we exchange kind words about family and life, but I know that I lost a good friend that day long ago when I walked away in fear.....I further realize that when I walked away from that person, not only did I hurt them I really hurt myself too....I shut a part of myself away in fear...

We live and learn......

Love & Light
Jamillah~

Unit 10

Good Evening Everyone

As I looked at this question I thought I had a deja-vu moment. I asked myself didn't I just do this..lol
Well yes I did...In the last unit I addressed my growth and goals. In unit 3 I assessed myself as  Physical 7, Spiritual 8 and Psychological 5.
As of today I assess myself  physical still 7 spiritual between 8 and 9 and psychological 6 ... The weeks have gone by quickly and I can see small improvements, but it took me all my life to be as screwed up as I was and you can't undo that over night (laughing)
As for my goals I have moved closer towards them I am eating more and trying to sleep more. I am taking time to myself to clear my mind and work on me.
I have implemented the exercises into my daily plan and I have also just tried to sit and reflect on my day more. Journaling was not part of my orignal plan, but I realized it helped to clear my mind.
My personal experience through out this course has been amazing. I have learned more about myself and those around me by implementing more love and kindness. I already was doing it but not with such a focus. So with the loving kindness exercise we used in this course it gave my energy direction and I can feel the difference. Sometimes after doing the love and kindness exercise, a feeling of confidence overcomes me as I know that I was able to focus and send loving energy not only to others but to myself. In previous practice I usually am so focused on others I forget myself.  It has been rewarding to have meet others with like minds and goals. It has been frustrating trying to slow down life so I can enjoy the things that I love the most. This class has given me tools to help myself and others. It reaffirmed that life is to be lived and suffering is perspective and that while I can not control what happens in my life I can control how I respond.

Love & Light
Jamillah

Final Project

Jamillah El Bey HW420 Final Project
*Introduction:
Why is it important for health and wellness professionals to develop psychologically, spiritually and physically? What areas do you need to develop to achieve the goals you have for yourself?

Developing ourselves psychologically, spiritually and physcially is something that benefits us directly and helps us in every aspect of our lives. As health practitioners it is our duty to be the best we can be inorder to give the best to our clients. I know that growth never ends as long as we are alive, so I will always be working on me. To achieve the goals I have for myself I need to further in all three of these areas. to get my professional body builder card, I need to monitor my my nutritional intake, get in the gym more often and work out more intensely. To be better equiped for life I need to continue working on my spiritual growth and psychological growth. Living a truly happy life takes hard work work that only we can do ourselves, it will make us better people and better practitioners.

*Assessment:
How have you assessed your health in each domain? How do you score your wellness spiritually, physically, and psychologically?

When I first did my assessment, I scored myself Physical 7, Spiritual 8 and Psychological 5..It has only been a few weeks I feel like my physical has stayed the same as I am still struggling with eating enough and sleeping enough. My spiritual is steady at 8 maybe even 9, I am continuing to spread love in every way I can and love myself more as well. Love is the key to living a full life and if I were to die today I feel confident that I have done my best to love all of creation. The psychological area of my life I feel has grown to about a 6, I have worked more on being in the moment and not allowing the hurt and pain of my past and even present things to trap me in negative feelings. I am learning everyday to accept myself and life. By not worrying about the things I have no control over, I am able to stress a little less. I feel this area of development can be the hardest for people as weare constantly challenged with everyday struggles and it sometimes is hard to see the bigger picture.

*Goal development:
List at least one goal you have for yourself in each area, Physical, Psychological (mental health) and Spiritual.

My Physical Goal : Get my body in the best shape ever, get my professional bodybuilding card
My Spiritual Goal: Be a reflection of the light and change I want to see in the world.
My Psychological Goal: Permanently Silence the chatter in my mind that sometimes keeps be prisioner.

*Practices for personal health:
What strategies can you implement to foster growth in each of the following domains; Physical, Psychological, and Spiritual. Provide at least two examples of exercises or practices in each domain. Explain how you will implement each example.

The strategies that I can use to foster growth in the physical aspect of my life are preparing meals ahead of time to take with me while I am out during the day and use the buddy system in the gym to constantly push my self to keep to my work out plan. In my spiritual life I can use guided meditation and continue to do my yoga daily. I have taken hot yoga in the past and that seems to make me feel better than regular yoga so I may sign up for a full program. For my psychological growth I will continue to use positive talk and affirmations. Daily silent meditations have helped to ease my mind, also taking walks and riding my bike gives me time to be alone and clear my mind.

*Commitment:
How will you assess your progress or lack of progress in the next six months? What strategies can you use to assist in maintaining your long-term practices for health and wellness?

Assessing my progress is easy in regards to my physical growth is the easiest because I can see and feel the progress or lack of progress. Growth in the psychological and spiritual can be harder to measure, however, I know that when you are spiritually and psychologically healthy, true happiness is able to take place in your mind body and soul. So I will continue to strive for true happiness by practicing loving kindness towards myself and others.